It’s pretty safe to say that people just aren’t happy with plain old regular tap water anymore. School districts have even started banning vending machines with bottled water to encourage kids to drink tap water. If you think about it, the tap water we have here doesn’t even come close to what they would have in Africa - so people need to toughen up.

That being said, the kind people from “Glaceau” dropped by these offices today and unloaded a box of “Vitamin Water”. I’d like to add, that 50 cent is one of the primary shareholders in this drink. What “Vitamin Water” is exactly, I do not know - but i can tell you it tastes terrible. If I really had to describe it, I’d say it’s overpriced juice - supposedly this stuff is like $5 a bottle.

Each drink comes with it’s own zany name and description. I had the supreme pleasure of tasting “XXX”, a drink containing acai-blueberry-pomegranate (triple the good stuff!!!!). The bottle then goes on to explain its witty nomanclature:

“c’mon get your mind out of the gutter. we only named this drink xxx because it has the essence of triple fruits and antioxidant vitamin c to help keep you healthy. and this drink does not cost $1.99/min, has not “gone wild!!!”, nor will clips of it be passed around the internet like a certain hotel heiress. and it has never been seen live or nude, but it is definitely au naturale.”

First, the writers at Glaceau have never heard of proper grammar. Second, how can something be “au naturale” when it only contains an “essence” of the vitamins it says it has. That sounds pretty slack to me. How do you bottle essence anyway?! Imagine waking up Christmas morning as a child and you’re expecting a new bike, but your deadbeat dad just got you the “essence” of a bike. In reality you found a bowling ball. Then your dad asks you if he can use it when you’re not using it. That’s what bottling essence is like. FAIL.

On another note, my web trolling lead me to find a pretty awesome site the other night. Sidetracker.com is a new website that lets couples crowd source their arguments. The fighting couple writes up “her side” and “his side” descriptions of their problem, and the anonymous crowds can vote on who’s right.

There’s already some pretty interesting content on there, and it amazes me that people have the time to actually post their aurguments - let alone make sure the other half responds.